How can so much change in a day?

I cannot believe it has not even been 24 hours since I summarized my Chancey’s story on this blog yesterday, and now he is gone…last night, his leg with the tumor began swelling.  We slept downstairs in the living room because I knew if I went upstairs, that crazy dog would try to follow, and it wasn’t worth the risk of him falling.  I called the vet this morning and since it was not painful to the touch, she thought it sounded like the tumor had blocked the blood flow to his leg (versus fracturing), and that it would be a matter of days.  It did not make sense to drag it out, when the swelling would only continue to cause him more and more discomfort.  The two hours between the phone call to the vet and the time we were asked to come in were surreal.  I just sat with him and talked to him and pet him and tried not to think about the fact that this was really it, that each minute that passed brought me closer to the end.  I was able to talk to my husband on the phone before we left for the vet so while he was not with me physically, his thoughts were with us.  It is a beautiful day here – the kind of day I would imagine Chance is still enjoying, sunny and 65.  I hope he is finally running again.  I tried taking him outside to enjoy the sun before we left for the vet, but his heart wasn’t in it, and I knew we were making the right decision.  I can’t believe this is real.  I can’t believe he’s not with me.  He went very peacefully and I know he is no longer in pain, but this ache…there’s just not any words.

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9 Responses to How can so much change in a day?

  1. etgayle says:

    we are so very sorry for your loss. you gave chance the biggest gift by halting the pain, but now it is your pain for a while. hopefully, in time, the memories can replace the sadness. love never ends.

    charon & gayle

  2. Fortis'dad says:

    I’m so sorry to hear about Chance. I was so hoping your husband would make it home first. I’m glad Chance’s pain is gone and that he went peacefully but my heart aches for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    Brett and Fortis

  3. ritables says:

    We totally know how bad things can go downhill so quickly. Also, we do also understand how they just are not the same doggie anymore, when its close to the end like that.

    Every day does get better, it does. Condolences, the loss is so devastating; be assured you are not alone.

  4. kazy55 says:

    We are so sorry.

  5. jdsmom says:

    You are so right. so much can change in just one day.

    What a wonderful story of Chance as a pup and how timing brought you together as a family. Your love for him then, and how it grew through the years, is very touching.

    I can understand the feeling of disbelief, I still sometimes look for my girl JD to come hopping in from another room, and she has been gone over a month now.

    I am truly sorry for the loss of Chance’s physical body, he was very very beautiful. The pain can be so intense. I hope warm memories of your life with him will comfort you and that you feel his spirit around in this very sad time.

    Spirit JD’s mom

  6. Oh I’m so sorry to read this…and so so sorry for your loss. This just must be so devastating. He sounds like he was a beautiful boy. Please take comfort in knowing that Chance is still with you and will always be forever in your heart. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
    Kami (Mackenzie’s Mom)

  7. jerry says:

    OHHHHHH! Chance, we are heartbroken. My Mom was just going through the blogs from the last week and just now got to your update. We are so very, very sorry.

    We know your pawrents are hurting right now. That’s a long time to be together. Please tell them in some way, show them a sign, that you are still around. If they listen carefully, I know they’ll hear it. We never ever leave, do we?

    Many, many hugs going out to your family. We are deeply sorry.

  8. chancemom5 says:

    Thank you all for your words, for your participation on this site (and Jerry, for founding it based on YOUR brave battle) It is therapeutic and I know I will be spending lots of time here in the weeks to come…so many thoughts and memories were rolling through my head all night…I miss my boy.

  9. tai09 says:

    So sorry to read this sad update. Even though you know in your heart that you did the right thing by Chance in relieving his pain, it creates soooo much heartache for his human family. Thank you for sharing him with us. Hopefully the memories of him will help to heal the void he leaves behind.
    Please continue to share stories of Chance with us in the future.
    Thinking of you and sharing your grief, Laura and Tai Dog

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